my heart is broken and i feel like i should’ve been there for this but i couldn’t be because he refused help
I really don’t want to miss him but I do and I don’t know how to stop it
Just when I finally got your taste off my lips
Your smell off my sheets and
Your fingerprints off my skin
You came back to me and left your memory all over me again
I don’t really know where to start with this update about the things that happened over the weekend. I guess in order to start I need to flash back to Easter Sunday.
Throwing in a read more here because this is going to be a long post and I know that not everyone is going to want to read it.
Something happened today that made me realize that things are either going to be really good and go back to how they were.
Or things are going to end totally and completely and nothing will ever be the same again.
I don’t know which one is what’s going to happen, but either way I’m very anxious about how things are going to turn out.
Anonymous asked: can u & mc just get back together
Oh, okay, anon.
As if I have any say in that.
Also, why are you asking me this?
MY PHONE JUST FUCKING DECIDED BY ITSELF TO DELETE MY TEXT LOG WITH MC AND I LOST EVERYTHING FROM THE PAST 3 YEARS! I’D NEVER DELETED ANYTHING THAT WE’D EVER SAID TO EACH OTHER VIA TEXT AND I’M ON THE VERGE OF TEARS AND I’M SO MAD, YOU GUYS
Gaah, what is going on with that dude?!
Girl I have no fucking idea at all! I don’t understand any of it! So, basically what happened yesterday is that I text him to tell him Happy Easter because I just felt like it was the nice thing to do. That harmless text turned into us texting back and forth for a while, he asked how I was, I asked how he was…typical conversations.
Then, I decided to call him after something he said to me in his text because I wanted to make sure that he was okay. So, we talked on the phone for over 2 hours. During that time I asked what he was going to do after he gets back to Austin tomorrow, he told me that he had a few things to do and then he goes “And then I’m heading down there for the weekend.” I was shocked and he obviously could tell because after my sudden silence he said “we talked about that…remember?!” I was like “Yeah, I remember, but I didn’t know if that was still happening or not.” He sort of just chuckled and said “Of course it is, unless you don’t want me to” and obviously I want to see him.
I don’t know, y’all! It’s just all so fucking weird with us! At one point I made a comment and was like “that wouldn’t happen because you love me too much” and he just was like “you’re right, I do love you”. LIKE WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK, Y’ALL?!
I don’t know what to do or think or anything anymore!!!!
Just spent over 2 hours on the phone with Mc. Le fucking sigh.
He gets back from Delaware Tuesday and informed me that he’ll be coming down here Friday to stay the weekend with me. He also informed me that he will be taking Brockton fishing Saturday morning because he promised him that he would take him for his birthday.
I don’t know what the fuck is going on, you guys.
I was told things that literally shocked me to the point where I couldn’t even really hear what was being said to me.
I just…it shouldn’t have hurt me, but it did, and it’s only a possibility.
When Mc when to ACL with me in 2012 we tried to see The Lumineers, but they had them on a tiny stage and we couldn’t see or hear anything. So we promised each other that if they were ever in Austin we’d see them together.
Well, they’re in Austin in April and given the way things are with us I don’t know if I should tell Mc and ask him to go with me or not. What the hell should I do, y’all?!
I had a dream last night that he came to me
Banging on my door until I let him back in my heart
Craving the feel of my skin on his
Begging for the taste of my lips on his
Pleading with me to never let him run away again
And then in an instant it was all gone